1| How your nervous system effects every part of HOW you can parent!

This is my 1st episode! I breakdown the Mom Spiral. It's a great introduction to what I will be talking about on the podcast overall. How much your nervous system effects your parenting and you don't even know it. You're never going to search for  overwhelm, burnout, behavior issues and your nervous system will pop up! And anything else we're told or given is just a band-aid. The nervous system is the root cause and it's the permanent, empowering solution.

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PIVOTAL SERIES
The LAST + ONLY thing you need to know about parenting!
8 part audio series. Listen in as I shine a light on all the places your nervous system shows up in your life and parenting.

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Transcript

Welcome here to the Mom's Spiral Podcast. I'm your host Jen Deck. I'm a mom of two girls. I lived it and I healed it, and I'm here to tell you all the ways your nervous system is affecting your parenting and you don't even know it, and how healing will bring you deep and real connection to yourself and your children.

All we want and deserve is to enjoy our kids and their childhood, and I want you to know that it doesn't have to be so hard and you don't have to settle for all the stuff that I think we uphold is just what comes with being a mom. There is a cause and a reason for all the unfun feelings and unfun behaviors, and there is also a permanent empowering solution.

It's a lot of constant, excessive, endless responsibility and even more when you want your child to turn out better than. Or at least not having to heal their whole lives from mistakes we make in their childhood. We have to become aware and mindful of how our stuff affects our kids. You have this power, and I know we're told and conditioned and marketed to look everywhere else, but inside it's the greatest gift we've been.

And we never learned how to use it. I'm here to share my own journey, what I've learned and implemented the tools I use to be fully present, connected, and embodied. How to realign your role as a mom with your energy and needs and create a life that supports your vision. I will be here so you can feel seen and heard and held and given permission to do motherhood exactly as you know and feel you want to do it.

This will be a space so you can open to your most authentic self. And to shift Decondition release, heal, and expand topics will range with a unique blend of polyvagal theory, breathwork, somatic experiencing neuroscience, energetics, and awareness, along with building the same foundation for your children through play therapy, secure attachment and emotional regulation.

Join me every Monday for a new episode, and together let's make this a lot less overwhelming and it's joy. As we possibly can. Hi everyone. Okay. This is my first episode and I'm going to cheat and I'm going to add a prerecorded audio of myself explaining or breaking down the mom spiral, which is the course that I run it.

It's a great introduction to just. You know, everything that I'm going to speak about on the podcast, but also just again, like I wanna cheat and, uh, put something up and get my, all the things that I need. I don't know that you do for a podcast. So this whole thing about the nervous system and how it affects your parenting and you don't know it, and you know you're never going to.

Google anxiety, overwhelm, behavior issues, and your nervous system is gonna pop up. And, uh, we just are sent in so many different directions and given labels and medication and all these tips and tricks from people that are never going to, um, solve the real issue and the root cause, which is your nervous system.

So here is my first episode.

So first I wanna say this is not out there. No one is telling us to do these things. I have an original theory on motherhood. I pieced this together from my own journey and struggles in finding the answer I needed for all the feeling.  and for the solution that I wanted, I wanted to enjoy being a mom. I wanted to enjoy my life, my kids' childhood.

I didn't wanna keep waking up with the best of intentions, but end up feeling the same way every day. So there are three main points I want you to know. Number one, it's about you. Number two, whatever issue you're having is one of three. And number three, you don't have to settle for how it feels or what it is right now.

So the first point, it's about you. Your healing will solve everything, your answers and power are within you. This is about me giving you the knowledge and the actual tools to empower you for the rest of your life, no matter what age or stage your child is in, because it is constantly. , but you cannot change or control your kids.

And why would you want to? We want them to be all that they are, but we have all of our stuff. We project onto them. If we don't heal it. When you are whole, you'll keep your babies whole. Number two, any issue you have is really one of three things. Your nervous system, your triggers, or your boundaries, I promise.

Message me. I will tell you which one. I think we live in a chronic stress response. Your body is stuck in a state you don't understand. You've been told to think and call it something. It's not such as anxiety, and you definitely don't know how to get out of it. I teach you how your body is wired. You know what's going on, and you can bring your body into regulation.

This isn't about a hundred percent calm perfection all the time. This is about having a flexible, resilient system so you can return there easier, quicker, and stay there. Most of the time, your window of tolerance grows and your regulated state becomes normal. Then you're able to show up fully for everyone.

The second part is that you're not stressed by your child for no reason or because you're broken and it's not going to be fixed. When you try to change or control their behavior, you are. It's the coping and attachment style you developed in childhood, and it has nothing to do with your child's actual behavior.

And everything to do with you triggers or the feelings you experience from their behavior. That's your inner work. They bring up what needs healing in you. Why do you react the way you do? Unless you take this seriously, they will display the same immature behavior that reflects your pain. When you integrate your inner child, the triggers are eliminated.

What is now healed in you no longer bothers you and them. Your stuff impacts the capacity at which you can show up and love them freely and fully. So this isn't just advice in hopes it works for. I tell you what, where to find it and exactly what to do with it, so you will change. That's the answer. You are the answer.

This works because the only variable is you. You have no control over anything or anyone else. When you know your body, you heal it. The unfun feelings are eliminated. When you know your triggers, you heal.  and they no longer affect you. The third part is I think as a whole, as moms, we settle. We think this is just how it is, that our kids are loud and crazy and literally don't have brains until they're 20, but it's not normal or okay, or just part of being a mom.

It's not. I know the difference. Now, you don't have to cope or adjust or live with all the feelings or find a label to justify them. All of the stuff you're feeling is literally the state your body is in and the way it functions. If you don't know your body and have no connection to it, you have absolutely no chance in a real solution.

I thought I would have to just sit there.  and be a shell of a person until they were 18 because I was overwhelmed and I couldn't handle it. I was miserable and I had even more guilt that I felt that way and that I could not for the life of me, show up how I wanted to, but that wasn't even close to how I actually felt about my girls, how much I loved them.

and so desperately wanted to show up for them from that space of love and joy that I knew was my truth, but it was my body that needed just a little understanding and attention, and I had no idea that's what it was. We have such a little and no of time.  and I wanted to be present and joyful for them.

For me. I wanted them to remember me as fun and happy and in love with them and our life together. I didn't want to yell. I didn't want to break them. So I know your potential is in all the moments you continue to let pass by because you don't know what better to do with them, and not by choice or intention, but because you just don't know.

I put in the work and I've simplified this as best I can for.  with as much clarity and intention as I possibly could. I went through it all because one day, , I knew I would put it together for you. It may sound weird, but if you knew me, you'd understand. I went through research and courses and training and books, and I took notes and I rewrote how it made sense to me, and then I implemented them and I tried them and I tried them again, and eventually I had trans.

I realigned my new role with my energy and needs. I consciously created a life that supports my authentic self and vision for my life as a mom to be whole and happy, and to create that in my girls too. I will be here when you need to be seen and heard and held and given permission to do motherhood exactly as you know and feel you want to do it.

I do not do empty promises. I will lead you to follow your soul, to trust and know yourself. I will make sure you are supported on the hard. And that you celebrate every single one of your. As you become your truest expression, if I have any part in helping you find yourself, that is the biggest impact I could possibly have, and I'm beyond grateful.

I take credit as a channel in organizer and a promoter for the Moms Spiral. I was the first student before it came together. In a precise way with a name, and now it is my message to spread. I know personally and deeply this information is needed by every mom who wants to thrive. It lights me up being in this energy every day, and it's an honor to connect with parents who choose more and are brave and mindful enough to know this work will change the course of their entire family and every future generation.

This is what we all came here for. Something so big is happening and it starts with each of us healing and expanding. Thank you, and I hope you join. In the mom spiral.

So if any of that resonated with you, you can visit my website, the mom spiral.com, all the information, more information is there. Um, like I said in the episode, and I would like to. , make this maybe a monthly thing, a q and a type, uh, episode. But message me, um, what are your top three issues? What are your top emotions that you're feeling every day?

I want to shine a light on how everything goes back to your nervous system. So yeah, message me and I will get back to you, or we'll talk about it on an. I will see you next week. I won't see you. I will. I will be back next week. You'll hear me. Okay, . Bye.